Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Do they say dude in California?

Most days, this job bums me out. I wake up at 6:20 to get here in time which means I go to bed by 10 most nights. That makes me feel stressed and rushed every evening when I get home. Only 4 hours to cram in everything. Hurry and relax! Then when I am here, I frequently say fewer than 20 words the entire day. The way we divide up duties means we all keep to ourselves and work individually on our own projects, then report to the boss individually. I don't generally interact with anybody for longer than it takes to answer the phone or say good morning when somebody passes by on their way to the printer. We have meetings every Monday morning to update each other on projects, and once a month or so I go to lunch with a few people from the office, but mostly it's pretty lonely. I don't know what I expected, and I don't know that we'd all be able to get our work done any other way, but it's kind of sad. Do you feel like that ever? I don't know. I kind of feel like I'm wasting my life away doing something that doesn't really even matter, and that is a scary feeling.

But, for the time being, I'm going to stop stressing about wasting my life, and I'm going to go to San Francisco! Well. In the morning. But my sister is staying at my house so don't bother trying to rob us, bad guys! Or if you do, please only take the couch. I hate that thing.

See you dudes later.

4 comments:

Erin said...

I hear you. It IS sad when you don't feel like you really interact with people, and then go home and stress about relaxing and calming down. I guess I don't have much advice to offer on that front since I'm dealing with the same thing myself!

Jamie said...

duuuude!! we totally say dude in california! :)

but, yeah - i hear ya on the feeling like you're wasting your life away working. i'm feeling more & more discontent with my j-o-b. There are 1000 other things I'd rather be doing. Things that make a difference in life.

I dunno - not much advice. I'm reading "Your Money or Your Life" right now - gives an interesting perspective on what we trade the minutes of our life for. I'm really trying to simplify.

Have a GREAT trip!

longbrakeliving said...

I am so lucky to have a job where I know the things I do matter and make a difference. Of course, it doesn't always feel like that, but I do know that many of the things I work on have a lasting impact on students, which is good.

My dad always told us to have a job that makes us happy, even if we don't make much money. I think he's got a good philosophy, but its a hard one to follow when everyone else seems to pursue money, not happiness.

Man, being "grown up" is TOUGH.

I hope you have a wonderful, restful trip!

Erin said...

I can totally sympathize with your rushing to relax feeling in the evenings. When I was working I felt the same way, and would even start to feel depressed on Sunday afternoon as I felt my time slipping away. I think that not having those feelings anymore is one of my favorite parts about being home with the kids. Having other people's boogers in my hair is not.